"We do the best we can with what we know, and when we know better, we do better."
- Maya Angelou
Perhaps you're feeling down or anxious - maybe you're unsure about a relationship, or feel you aren't living the life you want to lead. You might be having trouble making a big decision, or you keep making the same mistakes again and again. Has a loved one died, and you just can't 'get over it'? Are you worried that you might be addicted to something or someone? Feeling unaccountably lonely? Confidence taken a knock recently? Finding life difficult?
If you want to talk to someone who can offer an impartial ear, give you the space and support to work something out, or help you come up with a better plan, then my kind of therapy would be great for you.
I am a Humanistic Integrative Counsellor/Psychotherapist, which means that I believe everybody is capable - with the right conditions in place - of having a more rewarding life, and I use three main modalities (amongst others) to help you discover what's right for you: Person-Centered, Transactional Analysis and Gestalt. (I believe that the more you know, the more you can use!)
Being in my 50s, I have had a lot of life experience myself, and have picked up some useful tools along the way. I see lots of different people for lots of different reasons, and I have a special interest in these fields:
Trauma: I have undertaken a lot of extra training on this subject, as I think it is at the root of many human disturbances. By creating a gentle but safe environment, we can explore the best way to understand it and work through it together. This work is not undertaken lightly, and takes time.
Codependency: This is a broad term, but applies to those who are having trouble with relationships, not only with others but also with themselves. Often people say 'I don't know who I am' and only feel OK when they're with other people. Others prefer to be on their own as much as possible. Some people expend a lot of energy trying to control others into giving them what they need, with little success. We can explore all this together, and work out some healthier strategies for looking after yourself rather than trying to get your well-being from others.
Loss/Bereavement: I am a trained bereavement counsellor, and understand the desperation felt by a loss of any kind. (This includes a job, a pet, a home, anything you really miss.) If grief is left unresolved, it can affect your life for years. Contrary to popular opinion, time is not always the greatest healer.
Addictions: I have personal experience of addictions, and of recovery. This includes substance addictions (alcohol, street/prescription/over the counter meds, over and under eating), process addictions (sex, love, gambling, money etc) and living with others' active addictions.
Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse: you may have a very difficult relationship with a parent, or work colleague, or partner, and can't seem to get away from them. We can look at the reasons behind this, and come up with some new strategies for restoring your sanity...
I also see clients with low self-esteem, lack of confidence, overwhelming fears and anxiety and depression. Please don't think that any problem is too small to bring to therapy; if it's bothering you, it's important.
- Alcoholics Anonymous
- Blurt - Increasing awareness of depression
- Gingerbread - Single parenting experts
- The Grief Club book
- After Narcissistic Abuse - Narcissistic abuse recovery
- The Language of Letting Go - Read this
- Headspace - Meditation app
- 'Annabel Giles - Psychotherapist' - My Facebook page
My formula for a Magic Bath: 1 teaspoon coconut oil, 2 handfuls Epsom Salts, 12 drops lavender oil. Have it just before bedtime, stay in for as long as you can, restful night's sleep guaranteed xxx
In the Meantime:
Until we meet, if you find yourself becoming overly agitated, do this:
- Sit in a chair, with both feet on the floor.
- Shut your eyes, cross your arms and stroke your upper arm with your hand.
- Breathe in deeply for a count of 4, hold it for a couple of seconds, and exhale for a slow count of 7, making sure you really empty your lungs.
Repeat this at least three times, as much as you need to, and you will feel more grounded, ready for what's to come.